7 Reasons Why It’s Not Me, It’s You
I've had my fair share of good and bad relationships, but one thing has remained common throughout them all. EVERYTHING is my fault. For the longest time I was made to believe that I was to blame for all my failed relationships, that is, until my most recent one.
No, I am not solely blaming my ex's for everything, but I don't think I deserve all the blame either. With that being said, here are 7 reasons why it's not me, it's you:
1. I am not arrogant, you've never dated a girl with this much confidence.
I've been told a time or two that my head is too big and I walk around with it a little too high. Agree to disagree. I love myself; I am confident in who I am and will not hesitate to show you. I am far from cocky, but I will joke around occasionally and agree with you if you tell me I'm pretty. Personally, I think it's hilarious, not arrogant. Confidence is something you should want in a girl, not something you should degrade.
2. I am not clingy, you're just busy.
With work and school, it's difficult to make time for each other. So excuse me if the 3 days I'm available I want to spend with you, even if they are back to back. I don't think 3 out of 7 days is too much at all. That is less than 50 percent of your week. If spending at max 12-15 hours with me a week is too much, you don't need a girlfriend, you need a cat.
3. I am not angry, this is my face.
I suffer from RBF (yes, that is resting b-tch face). Nothing ruins my good mood like asking me why I'm in such a bad one. Do you know how tiring (and creepy) it is to smile 24/7? Do NOT ask me what's wrong or why I'm "always sad". I am more than likely not even thinking about anything, THIS IS JUST MY FACE.
4.I am not jealous, you're disrespectful.
I do not need to be jealous, I will trust you until you give me a reason not to. However, you do not need to brag to me about all the naked girls you follow on Snapchat or compare me to a Taz's Angel. Keep it to yourself. Hey, look at hot chicks all you want, I'll probably even point them out to you, just keep your derogatory comments in your head. I know you wouldn't appreciate it if I told you how hot that guy in my Marketing class is or how I would totally eat cake off of Channing Tatum's abs.
5. I am not unfaithful, you're insecure.
I am with you, if I wanted to be with someone else, I would be. Point blank. I have guy friends, all girls do, get over it. Do not tell me, "Go ahead, answer him," every time my phone buzzes with a text. It is my mom and I'm sure she wouldn't be happy to know you referred to her as a man.
6. I am not overthinking, you're sending mixed signals.
First off, shout out to Justin Bieber for "What Do You Mean?" That song is basically all of my relationships in musical format. I'm not going to beg you to pour your heart out to me or shower me with compliments and I'm not asking for titles. Just be honest with me and let me know the feelings are mutual, so that the "what are we?" question never has to come up.
7.I am NOT crazy, you've just never met a girl like me.
I have never slashed a tire, set fire to an ex's belongings, nor have I keyed a car. I am not crazy, I'm a woman, but I will not use my gender as an excuse for my actions. I have made mistakes, I have done things I'm ashamed of and said things I am not proud to have said. But I am strong, I am smart, and I am willing to do whatever it takes to make you happy. If you're willing to put up with me on my good and bad days, I can assure you, you're in for the ride of your life.
Then again, I don't have it all figured out. I'm no expert on relationships, but I do think I have grown up around enough strong and successful couples to know what a solid relationship entails. You cannot change someone who doesn't see the fault in their own ways. You cannot make someone apologize or own up to their mistakes. What you can do, is stop blaming yourself for what went wrong and be proud of what went right. A relationship involves two people, not one. So don't ever think you're "undateable" because of some bonehead who can't see the Beyoncé you are.
Sometimes it's simply not you, it's them.
Story written by Morgan Bulliard, a 21 year old Public Relations major at ULL who is all about high fives, fist bumps, and jazz hands. You can find her in the middle of the dance floor. Follow her on Twitter here.