Most critics that saw the movie, "New Year's Eve" hated of course, I am a mushy girl, and I LOVED IT!  One critic even called it pointless, but hey, do I know him/her?  NO, so who cares what haters think?  You may not even care what I think, and that's good, form your own opinion.

What the hell happened to this world when people go to a movie, and they can't seem to feel anything anymore?  I mean, it is a movie about New Year's Eve, it's not suppose to be the best script, or win the Oscar for best drama, it's about New Year's Eve, so yeah call it a little hokey and sappy, but to the critic above who called it shallow and dull, you obviously have forgotten how to feel.

Maybe, it's me, and that's okay too. But the heck is wrong with wanting to feel sad, happy, excited, thrilled, nervous, scared, and whimsical on New Year's Eve......not a darn thing, and I feel really sad for people who don't have anything like that left to feel in their lives, because I hate to tell them.....they may be half dead.  You might want to look behind you for the guy in the dark hood with the sickle.  Your number may be close to being up, but that's just me.

After everything that happened in my life this year, I still feel sad, angry, depressed, happy, ecstatic, HOPEFUL, excited, thrilled, nervous and yes, I still believe in the magic that life has to offer, and I believe miracles happen every day.

I lost my mother this year, after a very brief and harsh battle with lung cancer.  I was so depressed, I know that was part of the reason I had a heart attack later this year.  God revealed to me how exactly weak I am, and I had to "look at the man in the mirror" to see that yep, I am not that strong.  But you know what else happened?  All those emotions listed above.

I laid on that cath table knowing that there was nothing that I could do.  The number one question people asked me was "were you worried you were going to die"?  I was for about two seconds when I realized it wasn't up to me.  I even remember smiling while on the table with my chest in pain hearing the doctors and nurses nervously calling out numbers to each other because my blood pressure just would not come down.  I wanted to laugh because for everything I once thought I was, I was nothing cause only the Big Man was going to decide...."should I stay or should I go".  That was freedom!  All this stuff I carry around with me all the time that I can't do anything about anyway?   I just have to remind myself of that when the anxiety starts, but it truly is a gift.

I was so sad at first after the heart attack, scared, ashamed of myself, but miracles kept on coming.  My pastor John and his wife Linda come to visit me, and I knew that HE was there.  My husband cared for me so tenderly that thinking about it everyday makes my heart break a little for the kindness he showed me.  I met these great doctors and nurses at Heart Hospital, they gave me great care, and they taught me about change.  I started to grow more this year, and for all the time I spent ignoring God in the last several years, he reminded me He is the boss, and it was time to slow down and smell the flowers.  So I started to again. 

I can't talk or write about my mother's death much, other than to say getting over a heart attack, and missing my mom was not an easy road to go this year, but with every stumble I got a reward, and the blessings continue today, which brings me back to this movie, "New Year's Eve", the movie rocked because it reminds me, we are all the same.........we are all blessed, lonely, sad,  needing to forgive someone, needing to forgive ourselves, needing a change, wanting to be loved, are loved, are cherished, are worried about, and sometimes we on New Year's Eve, we see ourselves as we truly are, all these things, and yep, we need each other.  The final message of this sappy, chick-flick, squishy, heart-wrenching movie is................hope will always take you where you want to be, and a new year, offers new hope.

So to all you people who don't get choked up watching a singer get her big chance, a sick man getting the love of his child, two people finding each other in this messed up world, blessings, miracles, frineds,change, fun, excitiment, hope....that's have a new year to try, but you might want to hurry up.........................the good stuff won't be out there forever, so grab all this love that you can because when your numbers's can't cheat, beg, borrow, steal, barter, work or buy any take a chance today.......dare to hope for something wonderful today, and then go out and get it.