In this edition of "Not Necessarily The News," Tootie Landry talks about a recent trip she took to Victoria's Secret.

"Hey! I’m Tootie Landry and this is what I found out today! Just yesterday, I decided I needed a new undergarment. One of those “cross your heart” kind! The kind that “lifts and separates!”  So now I’m on a mission and I headed, of course, to the mall. I went to the usual department stores, but nothing there. Trying to avoid that obnoxious Kiosk guy, I slipped into Victoria’s Secret.  Upon entering, I walked by a bin I could have sworn was filled with sling shots! It’s so confusing in this store! I next came face to face with a mannequin that had more clips, fasteners, and ties than a tool kit! I can’t try that on, it didn’t come with any directions and I feared I might get a black eye in the process.

While I was there I thought I’d check out the Angels, so I headed to the wing department. No luck there. I guess since it’s Easter they are probably out buying Heavenly Hash Eggs.

Folks, this was turbo charged sensual overload!!

And finally, I did find an undergarment that LIFTED my credit card out of my wallet and SEPARATED me from my money! Cross my heart! And I’m Tootie Landry and this is “Not Necessarily the News!”